Does God Want Us to be Happy?

 If there were no God, it would follow that our lives would have no purpose other than to maximize our happiness as much and for as long as possible. On the other hand, one of the most fundamental principles of Christianity is that there is far more to life than obtaining happiness. Though surrounded by the mindset that happiness is the ultimate good for which we can strive, we nevertheless turn our attention toward higher and greater ideals.

I’m sure most, if not all Christians, would agree that happiness should not be our most important goal or the measure by which we determine the quality of our lives. Nevertheless, we still may make certain assumptions about happiness that could be false and even harmful. We can agree that our own primary concern and desire should not be our own happiness. But does God Himself want us to be happy?

It may seem odd even to consider such a question. After all, if God is pure goodness, and loves us perfectly, it would seem that this love leads Him to want only the best for us. Surely “the best for us” would include happiness, if not as an ultimate goal, perhaps at last as a result?

I think it’s important to begin by making clear what I mean when I use the word “happiness.” I think of it is a temporary feeling that is caused by something good that happens to us. It is not good in and of itself, but is simply an emotional reaction to something that is good. In that sense it has no inherent value, and indeed, this will be evident as we reflect on our lives and realize that most of the time we have been more satisfied when we have accomplished something that mattered rather than simply being happy. Of course, it could be argued that this feeling of satisfaction is itself happiness, but I would call it something deeper than that. Happiness is what we feel when we are enjoying ourselves with friends, or eating cake, or listening to music we enjoy. These are good feelings, but they don’t compare to, for example, the feeling produced by saving someone’s life or devoting our time to working hard for a good cause. If happiness is the word we would use to describe our feeling in the former examples, it would be difficult to justify its use in the latter examples.

Additionally, to want someone to be happy technically is not a desire for happiness itself, but for the person to have whatever it is that would make them happy. If I want my wife to be happy, likely what I have in mind for her is not happiness itself, but coffee and dark chocolate. Therefore, when we consider whether God wants us happy, in a way we are asking whether God wants us to have things that would make us happy.

If we feel that God wants us to be happy, likely we have gotten this idea by imagining ourselves in God’s position and concluded what we ourselves would do and want if we were Him. When we ourselves love someone, we might imagine that, given the power, we would do everything we could to make them as happy as possible. But we must avoid the mistake of imagining that our own love can be used as a model for understanding God’s love, and that therefore, whatever we would do out of love would be what God will do. Needless to say, our love lesser than God’s and would lead us to do many things that, while seeming to be best for someone, in fact would not be.

Parents certainly understand this. Their ultimate goal is not their kids’ happiness, but that they become good people, behave ethically, become productive citizens, and love and serve God. To make kids happiest often would mean to give them whatever they want whenever they want it. They probably are happier if they have cake for dinner, and less happy if they have vegetables. They probably are more happy staying at home playing video games than if they go to school.

Certainly it could be pointed out that, in the long term, they will be happier if they are healthier and educated, but this will not always be the case. And even if so, the happiness is incidental. It was never the original goal. This point is extremely important to understand, because very often whatever is best for us will not make us happier. In the pursuit of greater maturity and character development, happiness is not worth much. Hard work, struggle, and even suffering are far more beneficial toward these ends. I enjoy playing chess, and as exciting it is to win, I’ve come to realize that it is primarily the games I lose that help me become a better player. There are far more lessons to be learned when I lose. It is the same with life in general.

So does God want us to be happy? Not necessarily. I believe God wants us to be holy, to become more and more the people He made us to be, and to fulfill the purpose He has for our lives. Whether this results in happiness is of secondary importance.

Furthermore, I believe it is imperative to understand this, because if we don’t, the assumption that our happiness can be used as an indicator of what God wants for us may lead to false expectations. If I’m praying for the ideal house, or the perfect job, or to be married, or any number of other things, I may conclude that these things must be God’s will for me because I wouldn’t be happy without them. In extreme cases, we even may justify sinful desires or actions based on this idea. For example, a married man or woman may be unhappy in their marriage but very happy at the thought of being with someone else. It’s not hard to imagine that some people have justified adultery or divorce in such cases, because they assumed God would “understand” and wants above all else for them to be happy.

Another reason it’s so important to recognize that our happiness is not God’s highest priority is that this mindset causes us to focus mainly on ourselves and what we want. We even may imagine that, in a way, God owes it to us to make us happy because of His promised love for us. This can warp the way we view God, imagining Him as more of a servant to us than we are to Him. It may also cause us to pray in selfish ways, assuring ourselves that our requests are in accordance with His will because they would “create an opportunity for Him to bless us”, which we have convinced ourselves He always wants to do. We must never lose sight of the fact that we exist primarily to bring God glory and serve Him.

So does God want us to be happy? No, I believe God wants much more important things for us than happiness. And we would all do well to think less about our own happiness and more about how we can fulfill God’s purpose for our lives.

In my next post, I’ll consider a related question: does Satan want us to be miserable?